Film Review: Pirates Of The Caribbean: At World's End (2007) B-

Date Viewed: 5/27/07
Venue: The Bridge Cinemas

Pirates Of The Caribbean: At World's End is a mess. But at least it's a watchable, sometimes entertaining mess. If you thought, like I did, that Dead Man's Chest (last summer's first chapter of these filmed-back-to-back sequels) was a tad convoluted in the story department, then you'll certainly find At World's End even more unnecessarily confusing and patched together.

Our heroes begin At World's End in search of Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), whose sacrifice at the hands (well, teeth, really) of the beastly Kracken (at Dead Man's Chest's climax) has cost him his life. However, there is an afterlife in these movies, however flimsily explained (and beautifully shot), and that's where Will (Orlando Bloom), Elizabeth (Keira Knightly), and the recently-resurrected-himself Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), must travel. Once retrieving Jack from his purgatory and returning to the world of the living, our intrepid company must rally pirates from around the world to fight the dreaded East Indian Trade Company, who now employ Davy Jones (Bill Nighy) himself to do their dirty work.

Confused yet? And I didn't even mention Chow-Yun Fat's pirate lord Sao Fang, nor Calypso the sea goddess, nor the return of Will's misbegotten father, nor Keith Richards' cameo turn as Jack's father, nor the resolution of Davy Jones' stolen heart. My point is there's just way too much going in this film, and very little of it is thought out very well. Mythological angles and rules are brought up only when convenient, characters are often wasted (Sao Fang in particular), or meet a demise unbefitting in relation to their importance.

Still, the special effects are top notch and the action scenes are as breezy as they ever were in these films. The snappy dialog, humorous characterizations, and overall chemistry haven't faltered, either. At times, At World's End is a real joy to watch.

It's very frustrating to see a franchise with so much going for it stumble over a completely overambitious, throw-in-the-kitchen-sink story (which in it's bones, bares a striking resemblence to another second sequel, Return Of The Jedi). I know the mantra with sequels is to make them bigger than their predecessors, but I'll take coherence over size any day.

Film Review: The Last Of The Mohicans (1992) B

Date viewed: 5/27/07
Venue: DVD

Daniel Day-Lewis plays Hawkeye, an adopted Mohican in the American colonial frontier, who makes his living (along with his adopted father and brother, the real last of the Mohicans) trapping, hunting, and trading with English settlers. When violence befalls their settler friends, the peaceful trio are abruptly swept into the French-Indian War and find themselves escorting the daughters of a British general safely back to their father while fighting and evading other tribes working with the French.

The eldest daughter, Clara (Madeline Stowe), and Hawkeye fall in love during the journey, and Hawkeye vows to find her even after she is captured by the bloodthirsty indian war captain Magua (chillingly protrayed by Wes Studi), who seeks revenge against Clara's father.

Director Michael Mann delivers a real straight-forward, throwback kind of adventure film (and I don't just say throwback because the film is 15 years old). It's definitely not the swashbuckling, smarth-mouthed type of film we've become accustom to over the last twenty-five years or so. Mohicans has a naturally gritty, realistic sensibility that rings true and is a sight for sore eyes in the twenty-first century. Mann keeps the camera wide during battle scenes and does an effective job protraying the scale of the conflict (the French siege of a British fort is an especially appropriate example) while never losing sight of his obligations to character and story.

Lewis imbues Hawkeye with a classic hero's quiet stoicism and unwavering devotion (and as the image implies, he does a lot of devoted running in this picture), and Stowe does well as something a bit more independent and self-sufficient than your run-of-the-mill damsel in distress. That said, their love affair feels abrupt and rushed, like there's a scene missing somewhere. This doesn't surprise me, unconvincing romantic developments are soewhat of a Mann hallmark, see Heat and especially Miami Vice for further evidence.

At the end the day, it's Mann's simplistic approach that carries the film. The climactic sequence is a chase virtually devoid of dialog that manages to be tense, heart-wrenching, and beautiful all at the same time (big assist in this matter, as with the rest of film, is Randy Edelman and Trevor Jones' wonderful score). The elegantly simple visuals tell the story, and tell it better than words ever could. And that's a testament to strong filmaking at its finest.

Film Review: The Science Of Sleep (2006) D

Dated Viewed: 5/30/07
Venue: DVD

Music video director Michael Gondry impressed me with 2004's delightfully weird Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind (although many would be quick to attribute that film's qualities to Charlie Kaufman's quirky screenplay). Well, The Science Of Sleep, written by Gondry, is entirely, and unfortunately, his baby.

Stephane (Gael García Bernal) is a half Mexican, half French artist who moves back to France after his father's death to take a job designing calendars. It turns out the gig isn't as creative as it sounds, as Stephane finds himself merely handling text placement and putting up with his bickering co-workers. Stephane escapes his everyday world in his dreams, where we see his fertile imagination at work in the form of his own TV show (with cameras, sets, and props colorfully cobbled together out of everyday items), where Gondry utilizes a great deal of stop-motion animation and imaginative camerawork to supply the fanciful images.

Stephane eventually becomes romantically interested in his neighbor Stephanie (Charlotte Gainsbourg), and two have several playful adventures fueled by Stephane's creative impulses. But Stephane, due to his mercurial and unpredictable nature, becomes trapped in the dreaded 'friend zone' and struggles with bouts of depression and love-struck anguish.

I'm sure Gondry drew heavily upon his own life to create Stephane and his dilemmas (I'm positive Gondry's dreams, just like Stephane's, inform his strange visual creations), but while people tend to think of themselves as the protagonist in their own personal struggles, that doesn't necessarily translate when your tale has an audience. What I'm trying to say is that Stephane isn't a very strong protagonist, he's indecisive, conflicted, and stop-motion visions aside, not terribly interesting. But I'm sure to Gondry, with whom Stephane probably has a lot in common, he's a facinating and captivating character.

The Science Of Sleep fails because it can't find a way to make Stephane a memorable, engaging, or even sympathetic character, and no matter how you dress up it up, that's a death knell to any film that tackes one's internal strife.

Concert Review: Stone Sour/Lacuna Coil/Shadows Fall (Wiltern) A-

Date Of Show: 04/25/07
Venue: The Wiltern

Shadows Fall (B-)
Lacuna Coil (A-)
Stone Sour (A)

Occasionally in the big city there are two big shows on the same night. Such was the case this evening, with Heaven & Hell headlining a gig at the Forum and Stone Sour's showcase at The Wiltern. In a perfect world, these shows would've been on different dates, but of course, they weren't. I wound up at the Stone Sour gig by the simple virtue of that show being announced and on sale first. However, as Stone Sour's last notes rang out, I realized I had zero regrets with my concert choice.


Shadows Fall was first out of the gate and forced me into a sad realization. I just don't care for their live show. It's taken me seeing them three times to realize, that their songs more or less sound the same. There's not a lot of variation in tone and tempo. Also not helping is their lack of charisma; aside from vocalist Brian Fair, the band doesn't move around too much nor display much personality. It's a shame because I think they're a talented group with some respectable and entertaining albums in their catalog, but they seem to lack a certain "X" factor that would truly set them apart.


Lacuna Coil was next and managed to completely surprise me. I've always enjoyed the two-singer (male/female) Italian metallers, but their sort-of straightforward grooving metal never seemed to grab me enough to love them. Live, however, their sound has a vitality, an urgency that's lost on their records. Add to that a lively (and extremely polite) attitude and personality, and you've got a winning combination.


I'd seen Stone Sour once before about four years ago and thought Corey Taylor had adequately transformed his Slipknot frontman skills into his new, less extreme band. Four years later, I can safely say Taylor is a better frontman, a better performer, with Stone Sour than he ever was with Slipknot. Sporting newly short hair, Taylor led the band through a diverse and well balanced set of material from their two albums with aplbomb and a good-natured sense of humor. Even a short two song (solo!) acoustic set of "Bother" and "Through Glass" (with a little Skynyrd and Johnny Cash(!) jam thrown in) was aces. The rest of the group, anchored by (extremely under used) tour drummer Roy Mayorga, formerly of Soulfy, sounded great and had the female-heavy (I mean lots of chicks, not lots of heavy girls) audience eating it up with enthusiasm.

One final aside: I've complained before about Jaegermeister's shilling at metal shows. Yes, I know they're a sponsor. Yes, I know that by putting up cash for the tour they are justified in promoting their drink during said tour. But come on, a horrible, loud, and unfunny stand-up guy (I won't even call him a comedian) who does nothing but stand up on stage and shill for Jaegermeister between bands. I mean, come on, trying to convince us how much we should thank Jaegermeister for putting together this bill, getting the crowd to to do a "Jaegermeister" chant...like Jaeger is the first sponser EVER to put together a bill. And if I remember correctly, I still paid for the ticket, Jaeger didn't put on a free show. I say, put up your signs, give out your bottle openers, have drink specials, but fucking stop teabagging the fans with your brand and trying to make us goddamned grateful because you sponsor a show we paid to go see.